Virtual and In-Person Therapy for Punjabi and South Asian Women in Mississauga, Brampton & Ontario who are done performing perfection.
You look calm on the outside. But your mind hasn’t stopped since 6 am.
You’re the one everyone counts on: the daughter, the sister, the manager, the friend who remembers everything.
On the outside, you have it all together.
On the inside, there’s a running list of everything you should be doing better.
You rehearse conversations before you have them.
You replay decisions after you’ve made them.
You wonder what people will say (“log kya kahenge”)
And your own inner critic is louder than any of them.
You’ve tried the vacations, the meditation apps, and the long talks with friends.
It’s. Still. Not. Enough.
I grew up second generation Punjabi Sikh carrying the expectations of two cultures with a deep desire for my parents’ approval. You won’t have to explain what “log kya kahenge” means, why saying no to family feels impossible, or why success never feels like enough.
I’m South Asian and understand this from the inside
For High Achieving Women who Over Function
What’s Underneath?
Sound Familiar?
You say yes before you’ve checked whether you have the capacity.
You’re the first to offer help and the last to ask for it.
You do it yourself because explaining it takes longer, and because you’re not sure anyone else will do it right.
Rest feels like something you have to earn first.
You hold yourself to a standard you’d never hold anyone else to.
A good performance review lands for about ten minutes before you’re on to what’s next.
You’ve been “fine” for so long that no one asks how you actually are.
Over-functioning is a skill you learned. Being capable, reliable, and low-maintenance kept the peace, earned approval, and kept everything running. For a lot of daughters of immigrants, it was also a way of honouring what your family gave up. The trouble is that the skill never switched off, and now it’s running you.
Imagine if you could:
say no without a three-paragraph apology
make a decision without polling everyone
ask for help and let someone do it their way
rest without having to earn it first
define success on your terms, not your family’s, your workplace’s, or the aunties’
hear a compliment and let it land
Meet Hardeep Ajmani, Registered Social Worker and Psychotherapist
I have wanted to be a therapist since I was 16 years old. Growing up as a Punjabi Sikh second generation kid, I internalized the high expectations for academic success, trying to make my parents proud and gain their approval and I struggled to manage the competing demands of two cultures.
I am now proud of my South Asian heritage, and I honour that there are ways that it has impacted my mental health. Not until I was in therapy for work stress and burnout, did I realize that I embodied perfectionistic and anxious tendencies. That knowledge and the work I put in to break the patterns, helped me live a more confident, settled existence. It didn’t happen overnight.
I hold an intense respect for the therapeutic process and the relationship that a person creates with their therapist. In more than 20 years of clinical practice in the mental health field, I have strived to ensure that the people I work with get the highest support.
I’m so excited to help you see yourself the way you were meant to be seen. Your confident and settled existence is waiting.
What I Help South Asian Women With
Perfectionism and the inner critic
People-pleasing and boundaries
Burnout and work stress
Imposter syndrome and never feeling good enough
Overthinking and Rumination
Navigating cultural and family expectations
Race-based stress at work
We’ll do great work together if……
You can commit time and energy outside of session to practice skills and mindset shifts
You can attend weekday daytime sessions on a weekly or bi-weekly basis initially to jump-start your healing
You want a therapist who wont just nod along but will name the pattern, and hold you (kindly) to the changes you say you want
You are ready to step out of your comfort zone
You are open to learning about mindfulness, self-reflection, and our body’s role in wellness
You recognize that change takes time and effort
You prefer a therapist who swears, calls out the patriarchy/colonization, likes to share knowledge and talks with her hands
You will be disappointed if…..
You’re looking for immediate resolution for your pain and suffering
Life is way too busy to practice skills or reflect outside of session
You’re looking for just the skills and strategies and want to be told what to do
You feel a strong sense of urgency to feel better
You want someone to agree with you
You don’t believe your past has a bearing on the present or future and don’t want to talk about it
You believe that it is my job to “fix” you
The land from which I practice is part of the Treaty Lands and Territory of the Mississaugas of the Credit. For thousands of years, Indigenous peoples inhabited and cared for this land, and continue to do so today. In particular I acknowledge the territory of the Anishinabek, Huron-Wendat, Haudenosaunee and Ojibway/Chippewa peoples; the land that is home to the Metis; and most recently, the territory of the Mississaugas of the Credit First Nation who are direct descendants of the Mississaugas of the Credit.